News Worthy

Someone was flipping through the channels and I saw a glimpse of US news. I didn´t catch what was going on because of course it was in Spanish, and they didn´t leave it on the channel long enough for me to figure it out...because why would they care about American news.

But I realized I have no idea what´s going on in the states. I´ve been gone long enough to miss something big. What if the US has declared war on Canada, and my whole family has uprooted to joint the patriotic surge as the US plunges into a renewed spirit of colonialism. I knew it was only a matter of time before the American dream turned to conquering a country with free health care and limited pollution.

I hope for the sake of Celine Dion, we haven´t gone that far. What I do obtain from Mexican Noticia was an exuberant ¨GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAL!!!!¨ which meant Brazil won the soccer championship for the seventh time. Or maybe it was just their seventh win. In any event, Mexican soccer fans (in other words, every natural-born Mexican) despise Brazil and their futbol abilidad. To beat Mexico in soccer is asking for certain death. Guns are illegal to own, but they have all the power of the Virgin of Guadalupe and protein enriched beans.

I wish Mexico better luck next year, and I recommend US to play nice with all the other kids.